I was so impressed with judging the Queen of the Nile and sponsoring my own contest that, in the past, I recommended that everyone try a contest. With a bit of experience behind me now, I realize that contests are not for everyone.

            I used to think that contests were not for goddess types. I thought that people who dance from the heart and feel that dance is a means of personal expression that is beautiful regardless of how well trained a person is could not appreciate the point system of contests. I was wrong about that. At this year’s East Coast Belly Dance Classic, I saw that this philosophy does not interfere with a dancer’s ability (but perhaps not philosophy) to execute and appreciate routines that have a high technical and artistic ability. Goddess dancers can enter and do well.

            I’d heard it said that dancers with a folkloric, Turkish, or fusion style shouldn’t compete. The level of difficulty and technicality was not high enough to win. I do not agree with that. I find that people who do what is closest to their heart have a genuineness that translates into passion and joy that the audience can see. If that is coupled with technical expertise, that can score well, so non-Egyptian style dancers can enter contests and do well.

            So if philosophy and style should not exclude dancers, what should? Attitude.

            If you go into it thinking that you are the queen of the world and no one can possibly beat you, you are likely to be in for disappointment. People have good days. People have bad days. Even if you are a better dancer than dancer X 90% of the time, at least one day lands on a 10% day. Contest day could be it. Confidence is a good thing. Overconfidence is a bad thing.

            But the problem isn’t that you had a bad day, but the attitude about it. People who are fixated on winning usually don’t make good losers. Bad losers blame other people for their bad day. Instead of finding out what went wrong so that they can fix it, they may attack the winner’s character or dance ability, or question the integrity of the contest, or say that the judge’s were unqualified. Wherever they put the blame, it usually isn’t on themselves. When we point the finger outward, we waste energy because all we have control over is ourselves. All we can change is ourselves.

            On the opposite end of the spectrum is the bad loser who heaps all the blame on herself. She beats herself up for not practicing more or for making a small mistake. She is hypercritical. She follows her performance with negative self-talk and may cry and get depressed about it. This person is not a good contest candidate either because the experience is too painful. It’s not constructive.